today at school a boy named miguel jumped up on the lunch table
ripped his shirt off (his chest said “be mine”)
and started playing ‘careless whisper’ on the saxophone that he pulled basically out of thin air
like you can think i’m lying, i would, but
ARE THOSE BACKUP DANCERS
My boyfriend. He asked if I was off my period and this is how he indirectly described it..
SATAN’S SACRIFICIAL WATERFALL
A MOSQUITO TRIED TO BITE ME AND I SLAPPED IT AND KILLED IT AND I STARTED THINKING LIKE IT WAS JUST TRYING TO GET FOOD WHAT IF I WENT TO THE FRIDGE AND IT JUST SLAMMED THE DOOR SHUT AND SNAPPED MY NECK HOW WOULD I FEEL
are u okay
A few weeks ago my japanese class did a gift exchange with our penpal class in japan and their box of stuff came in today. All of the gifts had really cute messages on yellow notes. This one was my favorite..
Wheatley parked himself in the sink and Angie got really offended
im fucking crYIN G omfg
This is my favorite SNL skit of all time. I’m so glad it’s a gifset now.
IT’S THAT TIME OF YEAR AGAIN